Saturday, 11 May 2013

Do Not Fear

This post is a bit more personal than the usual ones... I don't even know where to start, a part of me do not want to share this in the fear that things might miraculously work out. OK, let me put it this way, I'm having a break-up. After 2 years and 5 months to be exact, I lost the Basil from Victoriabasil, there goes the title of my blog, eek! :( This came very sudden and I'm actually still in a lot of shock... This week I've been indulging in red wine and chocolates and I've been pouring my heart out to my mother and best friends. Thank God for them, they're so supportive.

I also totally fell in love with the blog Banana's Views, and I especially love this post... It's all about breaking up, relationships and life in general and it's a bit of a remedy to my broken heart. Obviously I'm still dealing with a lot of emotional questions, I mean how can you go from being into a long-term relationship to being alone and fragile... Does not make sense at all and I'm still totally shattered... At this moment I'm teary, bewildered and very fearful. Therefore I've compiled this little list, just to cheer me up, a teensy little bit and to express my inner feelings, for what its worth, in the hope to find healing soon. Here goes...

  1. I will love again. (Big fat lie, I actually want to stay alone forever, I'm done with men!)
  2. I will find someone that will seek adventure just like me... 
  3. I will not become cynical and morbid.
  4. I will be independent and successful on my own.
  5. I will stay cheerful and I will not ask God, "why me?" ;)
  6. I will not lay in the fetal position and hum quietly to myself...
  7. I will not leave my home looking like a hobo, with dirty clothes and swollen eyes.
  8. I will take good care of myself, knowing that everything will be alright. 
  9. I will heal, all in good time.
  10. I will have high hopes for the future again.
Do you have any tips on how to deal with a sudden break-up, please share...

Image - www.pinterest.com

17 comments:

  1. Anna Banana11 May 2013 at 12:06

    Awwwww sweetie! I can actually feel your heart beaking. I've been there, more than once. And I can say with authority that you will feel better and wine, chocs and best friends are the best remedy. You will meet a boy who'll help you get over this one and you're allowed to refer to him as the big fat douche bag. Thanks for the mention in your post and I'm glad that I can help in some small way. 'I won't leave the house looking like a hobo with swollen eyes' that's why my friend is coming to my place today. Huge hugs! Xoxo

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  2. Unknown11 May 2013 at 13:25

    What doesn't kill you just makes you stronger. I cannot explain why events like this take place, but I'm pretty certain it is a major process of the human experience. At some point in time throughout our lives the foundation we grow complacent with just crumbles beneath us. It is at that exact moment we and those around us learn the true meaning of inner strength. Take that pain, hurt, anger, fear, and most of all denial then channel it towards something positive. You will find out that you more than just a survivor. You will find out that you are a conqueror.

    http://healthybeautifulyou.blogspot.com

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    1. Victoria11 May 2013 at 13:34

      Thank you Brooks, this is soo powerful. Thanx for taking the time to leave this beautiful comment...

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    2. Unknown11 May 2013 at 15:27

      You're very welcome. Keep your head up.

      Delete
  3. Diva Desle11 May 2013 at 15:35

    Sending you lots of love and hugs!! It is at heart breaking times such as these that we should continue to trust in God and let him heal your broken heart. You are strong and will get through the hurt. There is nothing that I can say to make it better. Keep strong lovely lady. Xxxxx

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  4. Victoria12 May 2013 at 09:45

    Thank you dear Desle... xoxo

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  5. meghan silva12 May 2013 at 23:53

    I think the best advice I could give is never forget your worth its so easy to get in a rut of self loathing after a breakup so remember 3 things , you are worthy of someone who wants to be around forever , you are worthy of being happy everyday and finally that you are worthy of the best that this life has to offer because you are YOUnique , they don't make them like you anymore :)

    Meghan Silva's Blog

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    1. Victoria13 May 2013 at 08:46

      Will remember that Meghan. Thanx lady... :)

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  6. RuBe's Closet13 May 2013 at 06:26

    All I can say is... I'm sending you hugs and wishes for you to heal soon. It's such an awful experience and one day when you're all healed you'll be able to look back and realize that you are Strong and independent.
    Sterkte for the road ahead sweety!

    Rushda xxx
    Rubescloset.com

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  7. Unknown13 May 2013 at 15:38

    sending lots of love and positive thoughts your way. we all love you! take good care of yourself and consider doing something self-indulgent and just for you.

    <3becky
    www.loosefromthezoo.com

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    1. Victoria14 May 2013 at 08:13

      Thank you... Will do that Becky. :)xoxo

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  8. Unknown6 June 2013 at 09:26

    I know I'm a bit late but I hope you're feeling a bit better. Heartbreak is awful and all I can say is, it goes away over time. Till that time have fun with friends to distract you from thinking about it.

    sending you hugs

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    1. Victoria6 June 2013 at 10:26

      Thank you Catriona... I do feel better, will soon do a follow up post on how I've moved on with resilience! Yay! Sometimes we are a whole lot stronger than we think and nothing beats the power of prayer. xoxo

      Delete
  9. Nats ~Coral Tinted Perceptions13 June 2013 at 10:10

    I just found your blog after Meghan Silva's guest post and click after click and I ended up here... Your post is so honest and heart breaking and I am happy to see that you said you are feeling better in your comment above.. I remember thinking (and feeling) as if I will never be completely ok again but the truth is after lots of time, talking, crying and wine I can say it truly gets better. I love your list and they are all true! Good luck

    -x Natalie

    http://coraltintedperceptions.blogspot.com/

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  10. Victoria21 June 2013 at 13:20

    Thanx Natalie, some days are better then others... I just focus on my goals, I left my old life behind and I'm basically starting over from scratch. I still can't look at pictures of us together without feeling the pain in my heart, but I've realized that fortune favors the brave. I'm glad I wrote this post, and all the above comments really helped me in a way I cannot describe. :)

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Woohoo, thank you for this lovely comment! ;)

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